


ESC - Eurovision Warriors

by Songvakeppni (SamoShampioni)



Category: Eurovision Song Contest RPF, Music RPF
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2008-05-19
Updated: 2008-05-19
Packaged: 2017-12-12 06:51:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,303
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/808569
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SamoShampioni/pseuds/Songvakeppni
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Based on a very silly and ridiculous thing I saw on the internet.</p>
            </blockquote>





	ESC - Eurovision Warriors

The sound of birdsong filled the air. Leaves fell down from the sky. And they sat there, watching the moon and the stars, as a pink bird flew across the sky triumphantly. An orange mouse held a piece of cheese and an umbrella, while a while rabbit sang softly in Croatian. A brown dog sat there playing on a gameboy. In the distance, a yellow disc glowed bright as a green dinosaur wearing a bow tie appeared from it. The flag of the EU waved all around them as they stood in front of the building. A red cat smiled as he looked up at the building. But what was this strange place? Written on the front of the building was 'Eurovision School'. A building standing since 1956, but only used a lot recently. Pictures of dinosaurs appeared on a TV screen, pterodactyls flying high, stegosaurus roaming city streets, and a strange purple dinosaur stomping on streetlights. Jumbled recordings of news headlines began to play through the speakers.  
 _"Breaking news: This just in, Eurovision entrants discover secret Dino Runes that can bring back dinosaurs!"_  
 _"Breaking news: Dinosaurs on the loose!"_  
Cut to people protesting on the streets, holding signs with the words 'Stop Eurovision!'  
 _"Breaking news: Eurovision banned forever after dinosaur attack!"_  
 _"Breaking news: Are they holding a secret Eurovision underground???"_  
\---  
The Earth, once a relatively peaceful place. One song contest had changed all that. Eurovision had gotten 'nul points' from the world as it was banned completely following the dinosaur attacks. The contest had been banned in a fit of rage but that had not solved the problem. Nothing would.  
Crickets chirped around the building, standing in the middle of an empty field. A rainbow formed in a cloudless sky. There was nobody about, or so it seemed. Inside the grey building of the Eurovision school, things were different, every room was lively and full of people. All of the singers who had been sent to the Eurovision School running about. It truly was a Eurovision fan's dream.  
\---  
Kaliopi looked down as the green jewel she had in her necklace sparkled. It usually did that. She was sitting in the study room with Engelbert Humperdinck, Udo Jurgens and Michael von der Heide. Kaliopi and Engelbert were one of the few people at the Eurovision School, many others were talking animals. Udo himself was a red cat, while Michael was a golden mouse. Udo looked down at his sparkly trophy from the 1966 edition of the Eurovision Song Contest. It truly was his pride and joy. Kaliopi looked down at the book in front of her, she was studying hard for the upcoming exams.  
"Come on, Kali," Udo said, readjusting his hat, "Tell us the story of how Eurovision was banned again!"  
"Alright, alright Udo!" Kaliopi replied, "One more time!"  
She looked down at her book and there was a picture of a purple building.  
\---  
The year was 1956, the location, Lugano, Switzerland. The night was still, and there, in the midst of it all, a purple building stood proud. Inside the building, the first ever Eurovision Song Contest was in full swing. Jetty Paerl, a pink bird, was singing sweetly into the microphone. She was wearing the colours of the Dutch flag and her orange bow showed her pride for the Netherlands. The song came to a close. Jetty smiled as the audience applauded her, before walking off the stage, ready for the next entry to come on and sing their Eurovision song.  
"It was the night of the very first Eurovision Song Contest," Kaliopi began, "The Netherlands had just finished performing. Meanwhile, Switzerland wanted the secrets that were underground."  
Underneath the stadium, many strange golden discs were glowing. Strange symbols and markings were on them.  
"Switzerland had already done their song, and so could concentrate on getting the Dino Runes that were underneath the ground of Lugano..." Kaliopi continued.  
And standing there, next to a whole dug into the ground that was filled with the mysterious yellow runes, was a magical winged orange rabbit. Lys Assia. The rabbit smiled, looking down at her treasure.  
"Yes!" Lys beamed, "I can't believe they're really here! The dino runes! They will protect Switzerland and we will be the greatest country of all time!"  
"And so," Kaliopi continued the story, "Switzerland kept their secret hidden for over fifty years... it was September 2012 when the Dino Runes were finally discovered..."  
\---  
It was September 2012 in Lugano, Switzerland, and Lys Assia was sitting there, watching the TV.  
"Thanks for watching the Bundesvision today!" said a brown dog on the screen, standing in front of the German flag, "Be sure to join us next year!"  
"Of course I will!" Lys replied.  
Suddenly, a loud knocking could be heard. Someone was knocking very loudly on Lys' door. It didn't stop.  
"Who could that be?" Lys wondered.  
"This is the American FBI!" a voice boomed, "We have come to collect the Dino Runes of Switzerland! We know you have them!"  
Lys sighed sadly and looked behind her chair. And there they were, shining brightly, the dino runes. It was no use trying to hide them.  
"And so the FBI had the Dino Runes..." said Kaliopi, "However, the FBI somehow managed to activate the Dino Runes and release the dinosaurs from inside. People blamed the Eurovision. Soon after, Eurovision was banned and us Eurovision entrants were banished to the 'Eurovision School'. And so, that's the story..."  
"As good a story as ever, Kali," Udo replied.  
"It's a shame though because now we have to hold Eurovision in secret, underground," Michael said.  
"Don't worry you guys," Engelbert said, "I'm sure Eurovision will be unbanned soon enough... I've just got that feeling..."  
\---  
A few days passed. Stars twinkled in the sky as it rained yet again upon the Eurovision School. Eurovision entrants gathered around the corridors. A white Cypriot mosquito was talking to a bunch of other Eurovision entrants. Jetty Paerl and Stefan Raab were listening intently.  
"Hey," the mosquito said, "The national finals are starting soon, looks like Eurovision is just around the corner!"  
Indeed, it was what everyone at the school anticipated, the start of a new Eurovision year.  
"Yes!" the winged rabbit, Lys Assia, beamed, "It's finally here! We've waited long enough!"  
\---  
Meanwhile, Kaliopi, Engelbert, Udo and Michael were all watching the TV. Clouds drifted on the TV to the backdrop of the American flag. Of course, it was the November presidential elections.  
"Sure is great watching TV," Michael said, "And soon we'll have the National Finals to look forward to as well!"  
"Yes," Udo replied, "But before that we have to put up with this boring American stuff on TV!"  
"Hey!" Kaliopi interrupted, "The presidential election is not boring!"  
"Yes it is," Engelbert muttered.  
 _"And now,"_ the television announced, _"The moment you've all been waiting for..."_  
Signs flashed on the screen. _'12 points from Texas goes to... 10 points from Florida goes to... 8 points from Delaware goes to...'_  
 _"It's the final of... the American Presidential Election! Barack Obama vs Mitt Romney!"_  
Two rabbits appeared on the screen. The two presidential candidates.  
 _"Who wins? You decide!"_  
"I don't see why America complains so much about Eurovision," Kaliopi said, watching as the audience on the screen waved American flags, "Their elections are nearly exactly like Eurovision!"  
 _"And now... a special word from the presidential candidates."_  
The two rabbits appeared yet again.  
\----  
Leafing through the pictures of the 2013 entrants, they seemed quite varied. A Christmas Tree wearing glasses paired up with a pink duck-crab hybrid, a lion wearing a 'I heart Wallonia' t-shirt, a grey and yellow robot teamed up, a ladybird wearing a top hat, a walking laptop wearing a bow and a blue robot wearing the colours of the Icelandic flag. And that was only the beginning.


End file.
